Wednesday, August 22, 2007

A Big Thank You!!

Tracey you wonderful and kind lovey!! I got your package!!

Tracey sent a card for MIL but she also sent me a card and some bump treats!! Such a lovely thing to do and I just want to say a great big THANKS xxx

One Tuff Cookie!!

I got to see my MIL yesturday!! I was so scared that I'd be a mess or wouldnt be strong and was worried that i wouldn't know what to say to her.
Adj's Grandma was there so i waited in the day room while adj went in, I was a little nervous and wondering if I should have came but then it was my turn to go in, I didnt want to look at her in case my face and tears betrayed me, so I just said hello and then looked down. I looked around the room and then thought this is rediculous(sp!!) and I just took a breath and looked!! I was upset but held it in well and just talked.
She is just her, as funny and feisty as usual!! She made me laugh and I made her laugh, Adj was just great.
We had to go through bills and letters and stuff.
I am so hurt by her injuries and she was in so much pain, but under all the burn she's still her, her eyes and her nose is her, her laugh, her personality.

I was glad that I went and amazed at her strengh!! I am so sadened that she has had to go through all of this.

I'm still having bad dreams about him who shall remain without a name.

Cant wait to see her again!!

Thursday, August 16, 2007

one step forward...... one step back.

MIL has had to be put back into the ITU :o(
She was given another graft but her face swellled really badly and so they put her back in ITU to keep a close eye on here and to give more care.

I'm wondering why they did another graft now, why didnt they wait til the infection had been gone for a while?

Ah well... they're the medics and know what their doing..... just a little diheartning that's all.

Preperation for the youth convention are going well!! Will decorate jars and toiletries oo and make gift bags for the prizes later after Choir practice, also got group practice so will be a late one....

Monday, August 13, 2007


todays a blah day, I'm just feeling so depresed, I was meant to go to the bank to sort out a few stuff but i just havent got the energy, I feel like i'm in a hole but i need to get out of it... I've got too much to do and too many people depending on me.
I need to do something to take my mind of all this and just stop SNAPPING!!

I have the youth conference to organise which is thi weekend and cos of all the oings on i havent really put all i wanted into it so starting from right NOW i'm gonna leave my pity party and get my butt to work!!

MIL was doing well when adj went to see her, he came back so sad tho, he's finding all this just so hard and my heart breaks for him, he just is broken and trying to come to term with everything and he find it hard that MIL kept so much from him.

He is on auto pilot at the moment and i'm trying so hard not to let my hormonal rants and moods affect him, but instead, my darling boys get it all. :o(

Saturday, August 11, 2007


I am lost.... I dont know how to feel, what to think. I try to get on with life, with everyday stuff but I am just lost.

My mind is so full of so many thoughts, emotions and feelings.... too many to work out, to put into words even.

Last night i had a horrible dream where the heinious man... cant call him anything but a monster - was in it... it seemed so real even his injuries which although i havent seen in real life, looked real. It was horrible.

I keep thinking he's gonna get out of custody and come over here....

adj is so down and so sad, he feel that the monster has taken everything away from her and he feels it for his bro and nan. He went to see MIL today, cant wait til he comes back so i can see how she is.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

I've been tagged!!

The fabby Flapsi has tagged me!! thanks so much hun, deff made me smile and gave me a shiney!! You deff rock xxx

I had a hard time thinking about who to tag a I read so many great blogs and the author certainly rock.... many are already tagged with this award which just proves i'm right... aren't women always right? LOL
OK, so i tag:

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Happy Birthday Jayz!!

My baby is 4 !!!
4 !!?? I cant believe I had him 4 years ago... seems like yesturday :o)

I had planned to have a birthday party for him but with all thats gone on, it didnt feel right at all.
We went out to toysrus and then Pizza hut for his b'day treat cos we feel that MIL's improvement is good and we should let Jayz and the boys have a nice day. It was really nice and the boys were so well behaved.
Jayz is in a funny mood today, he seems a little sad but toys rus really cheered him up LOL!!

I'll post pics later or tomo.

MIL update...

Adj couldnt go up to see her today cos SHe was sedated again.... apparently, she's having her sedated dressing change and wash everyday... EVERYDAY!!! How painful is that?? She had a high temperature yesturday and so the doctor thinks infection may be the cause so the dressings need to be changed daily.
My heart aches for her but whatever they have to do for her to get better then thats what matters.

The monster - I cant even mention his name - has now been discharged from hospital adn is in police custudy... cant say much more cos of stupid legal reasons... why is it always the badies that get protected??

On a high note, MIL has been moved out of intensive care!! how good is that?? fantastic!!
She's been moved into rehabilitation!!


I finally got to play with my lollypop alpha!! I used mounboard, chalk ink (how yummy are those cats eyes??) and glitter!! I also got to try out the Swirl thick cut die!! so glad i got it now as i love the swirls!! They can be used as those paper clips you can get too!! Think i'll get some metal sheeting next week and see how I go.

The card making got me out of my craft ban and i just had to do a scrap page. I had the photo printed off for ages but since I wanted to use the glitter alpha and swirls i made, i wanted it to be quiter plain so that lead me to a challenge I've been thinking about for Scrapstars!!

A Lo with cardstock only - no PP!! and handmade embellies only!! ooo bet they'll moan as they wont be able to use their beloved Basic grey... LOLOL you I love you guys XxX

The page is very plain but I think i like it:


Here's the pics i promised of the cards!!

Sunday, August 5, 2007

I crafted!!!

whhhoooo i finally lifted my "ban" and made the two b'day cards!!
It was so relaxing and I felt quite soothed, just doing something that I enjoy feels so wrong but i really needed it and I'm glad I did cos the kids were much more relaxed too, they know every emotion I feel... they are so clued up its scary, I try to put on a front but they know when I'm not.

Adj wasnt able to chat to MIL cos she was coming out of sedation after her wash.
It breaks my heart to think how much pain she's in that she needs to be sedated just to have a wash, something that I ake for granted... something that I didnt even think about. They have to take off her bandages, remove the dressing, and then wash... I am now getting angry again, the one act of sheer wickedness just keeps on hurting her... even though the act is already done.

I am so peeoo'd right now but I will NOT let him win, I WILLL be strong and WE will get over all of this.

I'll post photo's of the cards tomo.

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Looking Up

Things are looking up and I am soooooooooooooooo amazed by this miracle.
MIL was nearly taken from us and here she is asking for a cuppa!! LOL

Adj is just ecstatic!! SHe asked for some yogurt when he was there on Thursday and she had 2spoons!! She had only had water before that and that made her choke. MIL took a few steps with the help of the nurse..... As Adj was telling me all this i was just buzzing and couldn't beleive it!! I know we've got a long road ahead of us but this is just so amazing.

I want to go see her but i dont know if i will be strong..... I need to be strong for her.

I went to the PO yesturday, I went to a few shops too as i needed some tops... my bump is getting sooo big also some underwear... big pants ahoy!!!
I picked up some grocceries while i was there and it was the first time i've been to the shops since it happened that I felt happy to be shopping.

my mind cant process all these emotions and i feel so out of sorts, ill and tired but I just wan to get over this first hurdle and I know i'll be ok.

I want to craft but I cant, I need to make a couple of cards so i'll hopefully just put all the negative thoughts aside and do them.....